Joe is getting annoying. He IMs me so he can blame his depression on me and put it on me that he is no longer motivated to go back to college. I don't think he should blame me. If your depending on somebody else to carry you through your life then your not going to make it to begin with. I just couldn't carry him and me.

I am listening to "Teen Angel" by Mark Dinning. Its so pretty. Next up is "Last Kiss". Such beautiful songs. I have to to start looking into taking the ACT and applying to colleges. I plan on applying to junior colleges and then maybe transfering to a regular college.

Joe is still trying to put the guilt on me for him being depressed and not motivated. I'm so tired of that shit. Ya okay I broke up with you and you are intitled to be sad. But you can't put all your problems on somebody else. I think thats part of what was our problem. He didn't want to help himself he wanted people to do it for him and when people let him down he used that as an excuse to do nothing and be depressed and not move on with life.

I've also been watching these shows where these people have life coaches that help them to complete their goals. Maybe thats what I need. Just somebody to help me figure out how to go about this whole college thing. Its very confussing. I have all these questions and nobody to answer them. Nobody in my family has gone to college so they don't know the answers. When I was in high school I tried talking to teachers and consulers but they never gave me any real answers. They didn't care to help me. So I kinda gave up and put it off. So now I guess I kinda screwed myself. But I'll figure it out. LoL google is being my best friend at the moment answering some of my questions. Well I have much to look into so I'm off now.

Old Tears + New Fears = Lolita